Honor Your Hunger

I've struggled with disordered eating since I was 14. I've been too big since birth, but 14 was when it was no longer "baby weight" or "those awkward years". I remember becoming acutely aware around this time in my life that my size was not okay. I needed to be smaller. I needed to take up less space. I needed to be lighter. So I stopped eating, in public anyway. I'd starve myself until dinner and then binge all evening in front of the TV. And I've been restricting and bingeing in one way, shape or form for 20+ years desperately trying to take up less space.

On this lifelong journey of self-healing, my next big thing has been to tackle these behaviors. I've been working with an intuitive eating coach for the last month or so and it's been incredible. In our last session, she said, "when you're hungry, eat. Honor your hunger".

Those three words transformed me instantaneously. I had this moment of clarity about how I move within the world. I realized I don't just push down & ignore my physical hunger, I ignore my ambitious hunger, my spiritual hunger, my adventurous hunger, my materialistic hunger. I push and push and push my hunger down for those things that are big. I ignore my hunger because that is what good girls do. We stay small, we don't ask for more, we make the most of what we have, we make space for everyone else.

But what if we honored our hunger? What if we were big and loud and nourished? What if instead of restricting ourselves, we embraced abundance and ambition. How would that shift our world? How would that shift our collective emotional, mental and physical health status? How would you (and I) show up differently?

I am hungry. I want more. I want to achieve more. I want to experience more. I want to connect more. I want to create more impact. I want to be louder. I want to be more dramatic and emotional. I want a bigger life than I have. And I want to say that without feeling guilty. I want to say it and not be seen as greedy. I want to say it and not have to say "but I'm so grateful for what I have" (even though I am). I want to say it and have the response be "hell yeah! let's get to work", even if I'm only speaking with myself.

So, are you honoring your hunger?